keeping moving, nothing to see here

I waver over the surfaces without resistance, I flow to and fro with limited know how and I beckon for nothing as I slip and slide through the textures divine. The art of motion is as significant as the sun. There are lowly departures of miniscule devotion, to impregnate the force of living into all, a gift that every being should embrace. A tomorrow arrives too soon and a wash of regret overcomes the ones who had fallen short of their immediacies.
To mourn the lost and neglected can detract from the needs for self reliance and a decay can spread into those who’ve come to assist the hopeless. A dreaded curse of deconstruction slices through the central experience and the death decomposes the rotations of the living. Let go, you must let go, to hang on to that which has gone will drag you into the same loathsome darkness, and that you will never be able to escape.

expiration

And life is too short, as if you didn't know it. There are parts of the day when you learn knowledge of something far from spectacular, but also something definably significant, it becomes yours to hold in that space inside yourself, rattling in the vast expanse. The words come from all of us at one point in time or another, it is a ritual after some time and we deliver the words without the will to hold them back. We wait for the looks of horror and acknowledgement, for it is not a friendly message we broadcast, it is not wanted news and we wish it wasn't true. Death, finality, the end of all that had so much to offer, but the short fall into nonexistence happens without forgiveness, only memories can remain. It is our own mismanagement of time that leads to waste, and to secure destruction we face mortality in the ways we learn through life's deepening cavity of despair. This abruptness and unwanted halt is rejected by the remaining lives that find themselves in pools of sorrow, anger, and depression. We who are left standing have the pressures increase before we can release them. The welling at the eye can grant silent reprieve, but there isn't any relief of the suffering we face, the individual isn't ever replaced. It is time for our actions to move forward, because we must and it is in our resilience that we can handle the turmoil, it is with fond memories that you survive. From this vantage point we find the grains of sand take on a new light, a different texture, a reminiscent scent, and the sounds unleashed as we walk across them in the summer breeze have distinction now as we recline back introspectively recapturing you.

Nonsense

We can only see to the edge of our horizon, because we are incapable of seeing further. Through instrumentation we can expand the realm of our perception as we believe it to be with accordance to the capabilities of the instrument’s ability to convey what it has captured relative to its scope or capacity of doing so. Our bodies are our instruments of understanding and we are incapable of knowing definitively anything more than we can sense through our immediate comprehension. Most of what we understand falls somewhere between imagination and sensation, so the remaining can be construed as confusion, misunderstanding and/or ignorance entirely. To know is to believe, to believe is conceive an understanding, to understand is to imagine, imagination is intangible and ignorance is bliss. Intelligence is the breath of mystery and the sensation of the unknown, wise is the one who knows they know nothing.

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the truth (nightly displays)

Beneath the bombardments of social chaos, surrounded by the sweating bodies which bounce back and forth inside out of the overflowing crowds, immersed in the rapturous sounds; smoke passes from lung to lung, regurgitated billowing burps, circulating through simultaneous suffocations, conversations represent superficial pronouncements endowed with amplified tones which explode over the enormity of excessive beckoning to be heard again and again, the ring to be observed over and over, but no one knows the fulfillment that they seek, because they cannot reach what was breached by their consumption, communications function has been deducted from the equation and recreation has overridden the situation, the sweet allure of intoxication, the odors of inebriation, the lacking of the blood’s levels of oxygen to feed the brain cells and keep the body from achieving its place in hell.

This is a celebration and the occasion is today, seized in a fantastic spasm, carpeted with a blurry resonance of dissonance, distracted by the abstract free flow of thought structures wavering tangent, dissolving common sense, forgetting what you are saying in the middle of every other sentence, shoes stuck to the floor and meshed with spent cigarettes, shirt spotted with burn holes and spilled drinks, peculiar scents litter the air in a noxious fermentation, cloudy speckles of unidentified, ill fated aromas.

This environment is my comfort zone, it is the reality of my dreams reflecting actuality, amongst this debris I thrive and propagate, it is the medium I excel within, this is my day to day existence, my nourishment and poison, today I sit inside out of it, I use a pen and ink rather than drink, again it is my time to realign, to think, the thoughts I relieve are clear and concise, just the same, I am here always in the bar at night.

10/26/2006 revisited

What are you looking at?

Pull out your pocket mirror and blow yourself a kiss,

The reflection won’t lie if you honestly mean it,

Take the time to give yourself a hug and take a deep breath,

Smile, look deep into your own eyes, what do you see?

What are you looking at? Can you hear that voice inside your mind?

Can you see the time, is it slipping by, do you know what you’re missing?

All of that time, once it’s gone you can never get it back, don’t look back, it’s already gone, it’s not behind you anyway, and what does it really mean now that it’s gone? The flood waters slowly drip over the dam ever after, the reservoir is the backwater, everything you were, everything you are, the trickle that is coming through is the personality that is held in your face, your speech, your you.

The laughter, it’s maddening, and you are the joke. Don’t look back, look forward, it’s everything that you have now, it’s the only thing left, so what are you going to do? What are you looking at? What is your name, first? Last? Middle? Who are you? What does your name mean to you? Are you awake or asleep? Is this a dream or a nightmare? Just relax, remember? Just open up your mind, we are all one in here; we are united, intertwined, inseparable, the unified being that stands alone in the darkness and light, timeless, in here. What are you looking at?

these days, here, alive.

The latest chapter of life’s rich pageant is coming to a close in the next several hours. The last few weeks have been a whirlwind of pandemonium and chaos; stretching the imagination of emotion, vastly and with curious discernment from moment to moment. The time has spanned segments of synaptic blasts, brightly with beauty and majesty, while also encompassing the depths of sadness, untimely and regretfully. Many miles have been traveled to acquire memories thoughtfully and with each recorded significantly internally, it is still the remarkable secret trapped in a puzzle waiting to be discovered in the truth of a new day.

The deaths, birthdays, graduations and celebrations have moved in and out of heartfelt momentums; hugs through tears draped in quivering lipped gasps. The late night laughter of old friends and the weeping words have occurred to echo in the chasms of our mental abysses. The sharing of securities in the presence of the pleasant companions we have walked many journeys with and the instances are gifts that we relish in.

These are the experiences we distribute amongst those we love and cherish, the prominent caretakers of our allocated occasions, thorough inspections to detect necessity. Insights of open relevance, delicately surrendered explicitly, because it is the way we thrive and breathe in actuality. The summation of our life’s significance is the winning wonderment of its briefness, sweetness, uniqueness and ultimately its complete bliss

April 9

I want to recline and unwind my mind, so I can find peace in the pieces of me I am able to perceive. As I lay back and relax I want to maximize the creative parts of my mental landscapes, the cohesive permeating aspects with respect to my circumspection. I am parting with knowledge, I am granting the pass to unmask my intellect, I have respect for your introspective singularity and it peaks my curiosity. I give me willingly, so if you grasp my meanings, hold on tightly. I am about to step lightly into the right direction for my life to shed light, so you can see that I am a master of the frameworks behind my mental securities, because from now on, the information is free.

Forgive me if you don’t automatically observe the understanding, I haven’t been planning these thoughts out for very long and I might not be right, but I know I’m not wrong. I long for the days where I can step out from under the haze and see with amazing clarity. The sagacity I seek is sometimes the reality I speak, but I continue to lose the truth because I have been eluded, so I look outward and I’m no longer excluded.

My surroundings are confounding, I am pounded by astounding possibilities, and as I premiere the fearless intensions of mine, I work to awaken other minds to incline their optimal enabled divine. The spine is straight but also curved; I bend and send the information through the navigations in order to take this shape to many places. I trace the edges and trim the hedges, so I have razor sharp arches that impart my smart stealthy arts.

The darkness is not going to be my demeanor, I am brightly glowing to show the only thing I have to bring, the legitimacy of being. I am not deluded and I have been secluded, but now I shed the onerous contusions to let loose the proof for you. Please peruse and do as you ought to, I won’t force this on you, I want fluid movements to glide and float your motions appropriately. The meanings are yours to look at and see, but if they are beyond your comprehension; you can continue blind to my authenticity.

I am gathering a force that divorces and aborts the distortions of misdirection. I object to bodily harm and weapons, I’m a pacifist by suggestion. I greet my problems with multiple solutions, unlike the malfunctioning institutions that bear the monetary ability to be effectively better than me. The trees are seeding and I am planting the new futures from my position, as long as you use your intuition, you’ll be part of the inquisitions that search out the answers that haven’t yet existed.

To test the twists and turns of the spiraling space, I gained a taste for diverse shapes. My appetite is rightly aroused by the life I’ve found. I look around and give thanks to the gifts I have been given, this eventuality I am driven to live in is making my mental chemical and electrical forces spin new euphoric grins. I am traveling through bliss, I am granting my every wish and I persist to blow kisses into the winds. This isn’t a competition, but if it was, I’d be winning the whole thing by default because I am the fully realized result of it.